Darling, You’re Not Broken

codependency

But my heart is broken. How the heck do you expect me to get up and smile every day?

We hear this a lot. We see it a lot. Just scroll through Facebook or check Instagram quotes and you’ll see heartache splattered all over the place.

Maybe your heart feels broken. Chances are at some level, it does. Whether it’s because Dad was a selfish alcoholic growing up, or you never felt like you fit in, or that dreamy guy ripped your heart out of your chest, held it for a moment, and then threw it to the ground.

And it sucks. It really does.

But the reality is that your heart is NOT broken. Sure, it may be bruised. It may have a thousand scratches. It may be pleading, aching, and very tired, but it’s alive. It’s working. It’s beating your “life” moment by moment underneath your radar.

You may “feel” broken, but I’m here to tell you that you’re not.

Now, pain. That’s a different story. You feel pain. Heck, we all do to some degree. Even on the happiest days there’s something deep inside that vies for our attention, and it feels a lot like pain.

But that pain, (any degree) does not have to define who you are. That pain does not have to dictate how you live your life. Sure, it may feel stronger on some days, and some days you may feel the need to stay in your PJ’s and binge watch Netflix. And if that’s the case, go right ahead. Give yourself permission to do so…

But don’t stay there.

Honey, hear me right now. The pain can be recycled. The pain can be transformed into something that will help you feel stronger. And more at peace.

But how? Well, it’s different for each person. It’s an individual journey kind of thing. I can’t tell you exactly what that will look like for you, but I can share what helps me.  And, I can offer to be the sounding board for your very real struggles. Because we need each other in our painful times. 

There are various paths to “pain recovery” so-to-speak. Get busy navigating yours. Try different routes, praising the heavens for any progress made!

I’ve done some “inner work” over the years, but I feel I’ve only scratched the surface. I seem to still have some “work” to do (darnit!)… Still have some underlying emotional numbness at times. Some days I just feel sad for no apparent reason. Some days I could put it out there that “I’m broken”, but I refuse to do that.

I’m not broken. And neither are you.

Let’s continue rooting for each other, doing what we know to do to grow on all levels. Personal development, spiritual development, physical development.

Let’s do it one day at a time, being gentle with ourselves and with each other.

Trust in life’s process. Trust that your heart knows what to do, no matter how it’s feeling. Trust that pain does not have to bring you to a halt.

And, dear one, trust that you are worthy of having some pretty darn amazing experiences here on planet Earth!

 

 

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